Hendon 3 Walton Casuals 0 – Southern League Premier South – Tues 14 August 2018

First midweek of the new season, so it must be Silver Jubilee Park, the home of Hendon FC, for their opening home league fixture in the Southern League. The visitors were Walton Casuals ( relatively speaking – one of the shorter midweek trips in this division) who are enjoying their first season at Step 3 under the management of Anthony Gale, son of Casuals chairman and former West Ham defender Tony Gale.

A perfect evening for football, still warm enough for a t-shirt at a push (how much longer will this last!) and the 4G pitch which as a purist i always have reservations about but i must admit does help at this level, allowing teams to get the ball down and try and play, especially during the heavy pitch winter months. And outside of that the pitch has allowed an enormous amount of community and pitch hire activity to the benefit of everyone at Silver Jubilee Park , Hendon & Edgware Town football clubs.

Hendon kept a similar starting 11 to Saturday but one key change saw Rene Howe drop to the bench and Ricardo German, Saturday’s goalscorer play a more central role up front, which was to bear fruit during the first half.

After early goal mouth action at both ends, Hendon took a foothold in the game midway through the first half, with a couple of goals in quick succession. Firstly Luke Tingey headed home a really inviting corner from skipper Lee Chappell in the 17th minute, one of those set piece deliveries that is begging to be put away and it was, as Tingey towered above a rather static defence and opening the scoring.

Hendon stepped things up a gear and were rewarded with a second goal in the 25th minute, which was all down to the persistence of Ricardo German as he evaded several challenges on a great run into the six yard box before managing to hook the ball under the keeper and into the net, for a fabulous solo goal.

Late in the first half, Walton Casuals were given a potential route back into the game with a penalty for a late challenge but Hendon goalkeeper Danny Boness was equal to Kyron Farrell’s strike, diving to his left to push the penalty away.

German sadly had to be replaced at the break after suffering an injury late in the first half but it didn’t affect the balance of the game too much as Hendon dominated the early stages of the second period and after a couple of good chances were missed, they put the game to bed when substitute Tyriq Hunte slotted home from close range after Hendon pressure following a weak clearance by the Casuals keeper.

Walton Casuals had their moments after that but overall the Hendon backline was relatively solid and on-loan keeper Danny Boness produced a number of good saves when called upon.

Still early days for Hendon but i think everyone connect with the club would have taken 4 points from the first 6 available and whilst not always free-flowing i think the opening two performances have given supporters an early cause for optimism in what was always going to be an interesting season given all the upheaval of the summer. Walton Casuals offered a threat going forward and with a bit more composure and luck could and probably should have got on the score sheet, however they looked vulnerable at the back throughout the game which is no doubt something they will look to address.

Probably not until 10 or 12 games have been played will we have a better insight into the overall quality of the division but with Farnborough the next visitors to Silver Jubilee Park on Saturday, Hendon have given themselves a solid base to build momentum from.

The Dismissive Approach of Companies to Job Applications. And the need for a little human touch…

Back in early 2018, as you may know if you have stuck with some of my earlier blog posts, my working environment under a new boss had become so toxic and my mental health deteriorated to such a degree, that after 15 years service i felt i had no choice for my own well-being but to take myself out of that environment, regroup and in time begin to look elsewhere work -wise, whilst trying to care for my mental health.

It’s a strange situation, leaving a job after 15 years, at times ridiculous as it sounds it almost feels like a bereavement. All those happy memories, the great friends made, the adventures had around the world with my job and the pleasure and pride of seeing some hard work bear fruits in terms of fans reactions to our efforts.

It changed over a one year period where the whole culture changed and the level of toxicity and the unwillingness of new people to listen and collaborate became too much.

So i got out… i sought CBT support after referral from my doctor (i have to be honest i didn’t find it that helpful , some people do, some don’t it seems). But gradually the stress began to leave my mind and a few months on i felt ready to get back into something new and began the job search, the networking, the writing to contacts new and old, the telling my story.

Even telling your story to potential employers is difficult i find, the ‘why did you leave your previous role?’ question, i’d rather be honest but apparently it is not good practice…. and you end up talking about ‘it was time for something new’ or ‘ i just wanted a new challenge’… if only we could all be a bit more open at times without question, the whole issue of mental health, anxiety, depression would be far less stressful to deal with. We all have our ups and downs in life (no doubt interviewers do as well) but the whole process seems to revolve around saying the right thing rather than being honest.

I am no-one special but i have 20 years of great experience, an appetite for hard work and love interacting with people and sharing my passion for football through my work and always trying to balance my professional responsibilities for income for a club, with the desire to ensure that supporters and their needs are kept at the forefront of any decisions that are made or products that are introduced. Rather than the short term quick buck now, gone tomorrow ethos that still affects how many clubs treat their supporters.

Anyway back to the point…

The job application process i expected to be tough, the football industry / sports industry are tough to break into and the market in terms of jobs can ebb and flow, between quiet and not so quiet..

But the one thing that has really shocked me is how dismissive companies (and i have applied for numerous roles both inside and outside the sports industry in the last 3 months) can be.

The time consuming process which you put your heart and soul into of crafting resumes, cover letters, filling in bespoke application processes, answering competency questions and then NOTHING.

I totally understand it is an employers market and lots of great people will be applying for roles and not everyone can be successful but my issue is with how many companies seeking employees have a rather forgetful and dismissive approach to those people who apply and they don’t want to go any further with.

And i am talking as someone who knows i am qualified for the jobs i am applying for , overqualified in many cases …

And this is where my anxiety kicks in again, that mental tick box in my head, knowing for example Job X closes on 1 August and their expected interview date is 13 August , or Job Y are saying they will sift on 5 August and interview on the 12 August , you check your emails, you wait for your phone to ring, you picture yourself in that role, the things you would love to do, to help with ….

And then NOTHING … except the automated response at the bottom of your original submission

We regret that due to the volume of applications we receive, we cannot respond personally to all those who apply so if you do not hear from us within 4 weeks of the submission of your application; your application has not been successful on this occasion.

I get people are busy, i get HR departments are under resourced and i get so many of these processes are even automated these days…but i think companies under estimate the human touch at times, even to say thanks but no thanks, or this is why on this occasion we don’t think you are suitable for this role…

It’s the not knowing that kills you, the lack of any contact that increases anxiety as those dates they listed for interview pass etc…

The world is a competitive place these days in so many ways but deep down whether you are a company CEO or the office junior, we are all human, we all have feelings, we all desire to be valued or of value and these processes i think forget that.

Some companies do at least take the time to say ‘ thanks but no thanks’ and you put it to bed and move on but most don’t, your time and effort applying, your CV, your life become something else just dumped in an automated bin somewhere. And it affects you or maybe it just affects me?

I have applied for jobs linked to my industry but working for two charities in the mental health sector in the last month, attractive roles that i would have loved to have had the chance to be interviewed for and to sell myself for but nothing came of it and to be honest that is what got me thinking of this post.

When mental health charities who know the effects of stress, anxiety, depression and the rest of it can have on people, have processes that are so dismissive of job applicants, how are companies in any other sectors going to be any better?

I even followed up to this mental health charity who are a national body with a personal email just asking if they could let me know where my application was up to and for any feedback if i hadn’t made the cut and that was ignored as well.

All i am asking i guess is to remember little things go a long way, whether it is saying thank you to the person who serves you in a shop, letting the person queuing at the bus stop go in front of you or even just letting people know, that this time sorry, thanks for applying but you haven’t got the job.

The mental health industry itself should be leading the way with this approach and sadly from my experiences of it thus far , it isn’t practicing what it preaches.

Here’s to the next job application anyway…!

Frome Town 1 Hendon 1 – Southern League Premier South – Sat 11 August 2018

I came to work in London about 15 years ago and despite visiting lots of grounds and clubs in and around the M25 over the ensuing years, only one club really has gained my ‘support’ during this time, that is Hendon FC.

From my first visit to Claremont Road ( I think the season before the doors were locked and Hendon departed for the last time) in 2007, there was something about the club that held my attention and over the last ten years i have become a regular mid week supporter both home and away ( Saturday’s tend to take me elsewhere with the groundhopping).

They have been an eventful ten years, that have seen the club play ‘home’ games at many venues (Wembley FC, Harrow Borough FC, Staines Town & Northwood amongst those i remember) as Gary McCann put together teams year after year that battled against the odds and that kept Hendon as the longest serving members of the Isthmian (now Bostik) Premier division.

Last season, was probably one of the most enjoyable in all that time, as McCann put together an excellent side, full of attacking intent and goals, who reached the divisional play-off final, only to suffer the heartbreak of a penalty shoot out defeat away at Dulwich Hamlet.

Unfortunately as feared, the play-off failure led to the break up of an excellent team, including a fearsome forward line led by leading goalscorer Niko Muir who has made a goalscoring start to life in the National League this season with Hartlepool United. In fact, it became more than the loss of a few decent players, as the long serving manager Gary McCann also decided to move on to pastures new at Hampton & Richmond Borough and took a number of players with him.

When new boss Jimmy Gray was appointed in June 2018, he was in fact left with literally no players and a need to completely rebuild the playing side of the club just a few weeks before the 2018/19 campaign began. The pre-season friendly programme (of which i saw a few) saw a multitude of trialists and new faces come and go, as the new boss tried to find a squad that would give the club a chance of being competitive.

This task was made more difficult by off the field matters, as following the major restructure at Steps 3 & 4 of the non league pyramid, Hendon were switched to the Southern League Premier South, ending their 55 year stay in the top division of Isthmian League football. So 2018/19 sees the club embark on a new journey, with new players, a new manager and plenty of new grounds to visit.

Hence why i ended up watching Hendon on their opening Saturday of the season, with Frome Town’s quirky Badgers Hill ground a new one for me too. The game kicked off in light drizzle which grew steadily heavier as the afternoon went by and with so many new players amongst both teams, the game lacked any real quality if i am honest but from a Hendon point of view , the team was solid and organised and that gives a base to build on as they go forward.

The second half had a little more goal mouth action and Hendon took the lead just after the hour with probably their first real shot on target, when debutant Ricardo German curled a shot over the heads of a few defenders from inside the box which nestled in the roof of the net. That really should have been that, as Frome Town themselves had shown little goal threat throughout the game, however sometimes you can just tell in situations like this that a goal will come out of the blue and it did, as Hendon failed to clear a corner and following a game of pin-ball in the box, the ball eventually was deemed to have just crossed the line by the linesman and Frome Town had their equaliser with a couple of minutes remaining.

So a point most Hendon fans would have taken at the start of this journey into the unknown but a point that Jimmy Gray and his team will be disappointed didn’t turn into all three, as it probably should have done.

Hendon will doubtless remain a work in progress for much of the early part of the season, as they try to find the right balance in a league that offers a new challenge. It will be interesting to see how they go.

The game was also unique for me i think on the programme front , with the matchday programme definitely the first i can ever remember that got both teams wrong…. the devil is in the detail.

Wembley FC v London Tigers. Spartan South Midlands League. Tues 7 August 2018

Vale Farm, is a ground i have visited on numerous occasions over the years, since my first visit there about 10 years ago, to see Hendon during their nomadic years when their Claremont Road ground was lost to the housing developers that have blighted the non-league grounds of London for many years.

Tonight though the visit was to watch Wembley FC, who took on London Tigers in their opening home league fixture of the season. Again another humid night (t-shirt weather), how long will this last? Perfect evening weather for watching non-league football or any other kind of football for that matter!

Vale Farm is one of those grounds that has all you need, plenty of different vantage points from raised terracing, a very well appointed stand running most of one side of the ground and plenty of cover and added to that a decent tea-bar, club house and always a decent well produced programme (which i tend to generally miss out on as i usually arrive a couple of minutes before kick-off and the loyal Wembley readership tend to have snapped them all up!) Tonight though i managed to bag one which killed the 20 minutes prior to kick off.

The other thing about Wembley FC is the pitch. For this level of football it must be the best pitch in the country bar none and as this blog proves recently sun baked yellow pitches seem to have been the norm of late, as clubs struggle with the lack of rain. Vale Farm though tonight was perfect, lush, flat, faultless green turf perfect for playing a passing game on. Credit to the groundsman and the quality of the pitch must even help Wembley attract a player or two it is that good.

As for the game, in all honesty it was probably decided on a huge decision from the referee early on, an on rushing forward reached the ball for London Tigers towards the corner of the box and after clipping his shot goalwards was perhaps just caught by the onrushing Wembley keeper, the ball sailed wide but the goalkeeper was sent off, after the referee and linesman conferred. As this was in the 10th minute and Wembley had no substitute goalkeeper it was a huge moment… one aside to this though was the way the London Tigers players made every effort to influence the decision, chasing the referee, raising imaginary cards etc, the usual sadly, which is always not my cup of tea…

Following this early dismissal, Wembley reorganised, with an outfield player taking over in goal and a tactical substitution and then actually went up field and took the lead, following a lovely flowing move. The early stages of the second half though saw the game turn and the replacement keeper was unfortunately probably at fault for one of the goals that saw the Tigers take a 2-1 advantage.

Wembley continued to press though and were rewarded with a penalty 15 minutes from time, which was converted to bring things level again. However they let the lead slip again in London Tigers next attack and then in injury time, the visitors scored the goal of the night with a fabulous individual piece of control and curling shot, to run out 4-2 winners.

All in all, an entertaining fixture, in a league i often find is a little heavy on players moaning at the officials rather than trying to play football but tonight was enjoyable on a quality surface that allowed both teams to concentrate on the football. Two opening defeats from their opening two games have left Wembley with ground to make up on the early pace setters but again they will probably finish comfortably in mid table as they have shown they are prone to do in recent years. As for London Tigers, after numerous seasons of struggle i thought they showed more organisation and have a few more flair players than in recent years, so perhaps a more impressive season beckons this time around.

As with everything, only time will tell…

Rugby League Challenge Cup Semi-Finals – Sun 5 August – Macron Stadium, Bolton.

The game of Rugby League seems to be at a cross roads at the moment, media coverage in the national press at an all time low, dwindling crowds at many clubs, a TV deal with Sky which does seem to have killed the broader audience of the game, a desire from some at the head of Super League to ‘redistribute’ central funding and all but kill the game at a lower level (as someone who now living in London and watching the likes of Skolars and Hemel Stags that saddens me) and a debate around non-heartlands / heartlands clubs and how the game moves forward.

Which in my opinion is a shame, as the game is still a fantastic sport. As someone who spent much of my childhood in Warrington and who was introduced to the game at an early age, maybe i am biased but for me it is still the most family friendly, whilst remaining passionate and whole-hearted game there is. Money hasn’t taken it over like top level football, where the divide between the players on the pitch and the fans in the stands has changed beyond repair. In rugby league, the players still live in the same world as their supporters and it gives the game something that money can’t buy for me still.

Players who are real athletes, who put their bodies on the line in the name of success week in – week out but who deserve better from the powers that be, who can’t seem to decide in which direction the game as a whole should go, the actual product is still fabulous and if given the right support and marketing, it should still reach a huge market, despite having probably lost a generation of fans during the Sky deal even in heartlands towns, where going to the Rugby League is not as natural a past time as it once was.

Still Sunday proved, Rugby League can still get it right at times, after low crowds in semi-finals in recent years, the decision was made to make the two semi-finals a double header and make an event of what should be a huge occasion in the game’s calendar.

And with all the tickets ‘sold out’, it proves there still is an appetite when the strategy is right, the sell out crowd mainly made up of fans from the three English clubs, Warrington, Saints and Leeds, with a small but ultimately very happy band of Catalans Dragons supporters in the main stand.

The set up was St Helens v Catalans in the first semi at 12.30pm, followed by my team Warrington Wolves (always The Wire to me) v Leeds Rhinos at 2.45pm. The ground was bathed in sunshine and the action on the pitch definitely put a smile on my face.

St Helens, who have been excellent this season, streaking ahead at the top of Super League with a consistency no one else has been able to match, were odds on favourites to turn over Catalans, but the French side have really turned a corner since a dismal start to the season under new coach Steve McNamara and it was always going to be an interesting game.

No one however expected what happened in the first half, as Catalans simply battered and out-fought the league leaders and went in at the break 27-0 ahead, helped by a moment of indiscipline and a Morgan Knowles sin binning for a high tackle which Catalans capitalised on with a game changing glut of points during his 10 minute absence.

Saints threw caution to the wind in the second half as they had to but the damage was done and Catalans added points when they needed to, running out 35-16 winners to reach Wembley and cause one of the shocks of the season. Backed wholeheartedly it must be said by the majority of the stadium (sorry any Saints fans reading this!)

Then onto the main event for me, The Wire v Leeds. Both sides have had an up and down recent past and Leeds came into this one having sunk into the Super League qualifiers and the need to scrap for Super League survival against the top four sides in the second tier Championship and although they should still have too much quality for that challenge, in this game they simply fell away after taking an early lead through Ryan Hall’s try.

Once Tom Lineham broke the line for Warrington to go the length of the field for a try under the sticks, Warrington didn’t really look back and pushed themselves into a 26-6 lead at the break, which despite a brighter opening to the second half from Leeds, they never looked like relinquishing. And so it proved, as a succession of tries late on pushed Warrington on to a 48-12 victory and a return to Wembley.

All in all, Rugby League got it right today, two decent games (although maybe not competitive enough games for the complete neutral), live broadcast on BBC television (reminding a wider audience Rugby League is still alive and well-ish), a stadium that was sold out (although unsurprisingly many Saints fans left before and during the second game).

Value for money indeed , a £25 ticket for 2 top level games, i just wish the game could push itself to a wider audience again, bring it back to those days when it was a topic of conversation for more people. Hopefully those running the game, can find a solution and a way forward to making days like this one, the rule rather than the exception. Although with Catalans now in the final (deservedly i must add), the challenge is going to be huge to draw a big crowd to the final at Wembley, given their travelling support will be more limited than had Saints reached the final.

Cross Border Double – Saturday 4 August 2018. Kerry FC 0 v 1 Abermule followed by Ellesmere Rangers 1 v 5 Rylands.

The opportunity for a double game Saturday occasionally presents itself and especially when it is a good run mileage wise and there is a chance to capture two new grounds in an afternoon, it always seems too good an opportunity to miss.

So on Saturday, the Sat Nav pointed us firstly to mid Wales and Dolforgan Park , the picturesque ground of Kerry FC, from the Mid Wales League. I visited many of the grounds in this league at a number of organised groundhops a few years back but i missed a few, of which Kerry was one and it is always a fabulous part of the world to visit for football.

After a surprisingly trouble free journey via the M1, M6 and M54 , we stopped off to refuel at an old favourite the ex Little Chef at Shrewsbury, which Eurogarages decided to run into the ground since they bought the chain (but not the name) a couple of years ago and have now rebranded the few remaining restaurants they can’t franchise out to another chain into their self named EG Diners. Still the same friendly staff at this one from the old days and an Olympic Breakfast (re-branded as The Mighty One by the marketing geniuses at Eurogarages!) set us up for the day.

Then it was a case of getting off the A5 and driving through some lovely countryside until we arrived at Kerry about 11.45am for the advertised 12 noon kick off. Unfortunately for some reason, they tweeted whilst the players were warming up to say they were now kicking off at 12.30pm, which was going to make getting to our planned second game very tight indeed. Not sure why, perhaps the late arrival of the referee or something was all we could surmise…

Anyway proceedings did get underway about 12.25pm, as Kerry entertained local rivals Abermule FC, a neighbouring village 4 miles or so away. The first half was quite even, with few chances of note but the visitors took the game to their opponents early on in the second half and were rewarded by the only goal of the game after about an hour.

The setting of the ground is very pleasant, tree lined and a small amount of cover available on one side with the pitch fully railed and a huge sweeping tree lined hill behind the far goal. The tea-bar wasn’t open unfortunately on Saturday, so i am unable to give a lowdown but i am sure the standard fare is available at league games.

One surprise was to hear a voice i recognised from television, well at least for anyone who has watched the fabulous BBC One Wales series’ on Snowdonia and Brecon Beacons in recent years, that of naturalist and presenter Iolo Williams, who lives locally and i am guessing must have been watching a family member in the game.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b09qq181 for anyone interested!

The referee brought the game to a halt at 2.05pm and this left just under an hour to do the 60 minute journey to our second planned game. Arriving a minute or so after kick off after spending much of the route stuck behind a Sunday driver (obviously making a weekend of it!).

Our destination was back across the border (well a couple of miles or so) at Ellesmere Rangers, who play in the market town of Ellesmere in Shropshire, again a very pleasant part of the world.

After spending many seasons in the West Midlands Regional League, Ellesmere were one of the victims (or beneficiaries depending on your point of view), of the recent movement of teams at various levels of the non-league game, so were kicking off the new season, with a home league game in the North West Counties League Division 1 South, with their visitors also newcomers, Rylands FC, hailing from Warrington and playing their first ever season at Step 6.

After spending much of my childhood playing junior football in Warrington Leagues, Rylands was a name i had heard before since playing against one of their junior sides many moons ago but it seems the club has progressed hugely in recent years with some recent outside investment from the football agent Paul Stretford ( an ex Rylands player and Wayne Rooney’s agent).

After a fairly even start, once Rylands had gone ahead after the home defence were unable to clear a corner, the visitors took over. They added 2 further goals before the break, with the home side continuing to fail to deal with set pieces and in the second half could have scored plenty more, in the end they had to make to with just a couple, to push them 5-0 ahead before the home side grabbed a late penalty as a reward for their efforts.

Rylands look a very well drilled side for this level and it will be interesting to see how they progress, the home side looked a little short (though it is always hard to judge at this stage of the season) and they may find the switch to the always competitive NWCL a tough one.

Ellesmere are one of those clubs you wish every success though, a friendly welcome, a lovely new clubhouse and well stocked tea bar (thumbs up for the home made flapjack!) and volunteers smartly turned out in club polo shirts who were very helpful, even tracking down a programme for us after they had initially sold out on the gate.

All in all, another enjoyable day in the sunshine and two new grounds to add to the list.

Kirkley & Pakefield 0 Lowestoft Town 2 – Pre Season Friendly Tues 31 July 2018.

There are always those grounds that for one reason or another repeatedly elude you and for me Kirkley & Pakefield’s Walmer Road ground was one of them, despite numerous visits to the town, its second senior club had stayed on my do to list.

However, that was finally put right last Tuesday, on a lovely summer evening, as KPFC entertained near neighbours Lowestoft Town in a pre-season friendly, in front of a healthy crowd no doubt swelled by the visiting support.

The ground was very well maintained, a couple of covered areas available, a stand on the far side of the pitch and a pitch that had definitely seen a bit more water than some of the grounds i have recently visited.

Pre-match i had a 3 mile walk to the game from my in-laws place where i was staying and so the well stocked tea-bar was put to good use having worked up an appetite for sausage and chips and a brew.

As for the game, i was really impressed with the home side, who took the game to their high ranked opponents in the first half and caused numerous problems and close calls, without being able to find the finish that would have given them a lead they would have deserved. As so often happens though, Lowestoft then took the lead late in the first half with a fine finish from a break forward.

Numerous substitutions made the second half a tad less engaging but again Kirkley deserved something, drawing two or three fine saves from the visiting goalkeeper in the early stages of the half. Lowestoft again though came into the game more as the half progressed and added a second and final goal in the latter stages of the game, to secure a 2-0 win.

I was surprised to see KPFC lost their opening league game on Saturday but on the value of the game i saw i wouldn’t be surprised to see them in contention in the Eastern Counties League during 2018/19.

All in all, a fine night’s entertainment in a pleasant ground, bathed in hazy sunshine at what looked on first glance a very well run club whose results i will keep an eye out for as the season progresses.

The world of isolation.

One of those posts, where i almost don’t know where it will take me, i just wanted to write something about isolation and loneliness.

I don’t do loneliness very well or isolation for that matter but since i departed my job a couple of months back, i have plunged into a more isolated world that i am finding harder and harder to deal with.

I have tried to maintain a structure to my days, wake up with the alarm, eat breakfast, job search, reply to emails , more job searching, feed myself (when i can be bothered etc) but whilst the world goes on around you, friends are busy at work (and you don’t want to hassle them), the isolation grows whilst you can’t find work and it is difficult.

I miss the laughs in the office, the smiles, the odd word of praise (not from my bosses mind – that didn’t happen!) but above all i miss friends, company, interaction and whilst my search for a suitable job goes on , the feeling of isolation gets worse and worse, the feeling of being down grows and your anxiety eats away at you.

I even feel isolated in the way certain companies treat job applicants (even mental health charities who i have applied for work with). No response even after closing dates for jobs pass by just make you feel even more isolated and worthless, that a company is too busy even to acknowledge you.. as i say the world carries on and your part in it just feels smaller and smaller..

Friends of course try and support me, inviting me for lunch, saying the right things etc but it’s hard to really feel part of it. I guess i didn’t realise how much my job and the people who surrounded me everyday defined my life, gave me a purpose and a reason for being…

Isolation eats away at you, makes you question yourself and your value and makes the anxiety that put you in this position in the first place grow and grow.

I also feel like i am letting others down, by not saying ‘ i have a job’ when they walk through the door at night, perhaps i am being too hard on myself, i don’t know anymore… one worry leads to another etc etc

Part of the reason, i started this blog really is too allow me to unload what is in my brain onto the page, i have no idea if anyone relates or not, i guess it just helps me to think it aloud…

I am waiting on a couple more job applications and for companies to come back to me, here’s hoping this week is one that changes my direction and makes me feel more positive.

I have a lot to offer i still think, i just don’t have anyone to offer it too at the moment.

I also find this article on the same subject quite interesting

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-athletes-way/201511/loneliness-perceived-social-isolation-is-public-enemy-no-1

Rugby League beyond the heartlands – Sunday 29 July 2018. Hemel Stags 30 West Wales Raiders 22.

Spending many of my formative years in Warrington, rugby league was part of my surrounds from an early age and despite moving to London many years ago I still try to see The Wire a few times each season, watch games on television and try and get along to as many games in the South, at London Skolars, Hemel Stags and occasionally London Broncos as possible (although their £20 admission is always a bit off putting in their current stadium in Ealing).

Last Sunday, a rainy afternoon when all the recent sunshine was a distant memory, I went along to Pennine Way for the third time this season as the bottom two clubs in Rugby League’s professional structure squared up. Hemel Stags and the West Wales Raiders. Both sides have suffered many heavy defeats this season, with West Wales in yet another new guise after their Scorpions and Ironmen days yet to register a point.

The game at this level is about as far removed from Super League as it gets, with the teams emerging into the rain in front of the stand holding a ground of around 50 people comfortably. The stand at Hemel is one of those structures that doesn’t seem to be designed to keep inclement weather out, in any way, shape or form!

The game saw West Wales give a whole hearted performance which just fell short, as Hemel emerged 30-22 victors. Though a couple of late disallowed ‘tries’ for the Welsh side could have seen a different result. It was the usual fare at this level, lots of endeavour, the odd moment of class and a few too many handling errors.

As a big supporter of Rugby League expanding outside the heartlands though, you have to wonder if the RFL and Super League really have any interest in truly developing the game at this level. Hemel now bring players down from Yorkshire for each game and it seems to driven local fans away compared to a few seasons ago when there was a more local feel to the team. And West Wales have gamely battled on under various names in recent years. There have been rumblings that new Super League chief executive Robert Elstone is making a power grab and certain Super League chairman want to cut back on central funding for the lower divisions but for me the game can ill afford to lose clubs at any level. Short term gains for a few larger clubs at the expense of the collective at all levels is wrong. Sadly however as the Premier League has proved over recent years the days of sport being focused on anything but money and greed seem fewer and fewer.

A Three Game Day – Wolverhampton Sporting, Shepshed Dynamo & Sleaford Town – Sat 28 July 2018.

One of my pastimes in life, is visiting what would be to some far too many football grounds or to others ‘groundhopping’. I have being watching football at all levels since my first visit to Anfield back in 1979 and then at non-league grounds around the Merseyside area shortly afterwards.

I never tried to become a groundhopper, i suppose it just happened over the years and definitely in the last 10 – 12 years i have enjoyed actively seeking out new grounds to visit and planning trips, rather than it just happening to me through going to watch the various non-league and one particularly league team i support play at new grounds.

Over the last 10 years, the number of grounds i have visited, i have recently worked out has now grown to over 1000 and hopefully will continue to grow further as there are always new places to visit and add to the list.

Part of the enjoyment of visiting new grounds for me, is i suppose the act of visiting new places, going to places off the beaten track and beyond the usual tourist traps and if you can fit more than one into a day, so much the better (although yes i have many friends who think it madness but who then love hearing about where my travels have recently taken me).

So yesterday was one of those rare days, a 3 game day, which occasionally you get the opportunity to do, thanks to the vagaries of the fixture planners..

An early start from London , saw us arrive into Cannock about 10.30am for the now customary Morrisons breakfast (oh for the days of the recently finally demised Little Chef’s again, i am sure there is an article in me about them at some stage!) and then a short trip over to Pride Park, the home of Wolverhampton Sporting Community FC who were kicking off early today in a home pre-season friendly against higher level opponents in the form of Rushall Olympic. The game kicked off in the first slightly dubious weather we have seen for weeks (and the yellow-in-patches pitch showed what groundsmen have been up against this summer)… Rushall notched an early goal and despite having more of the play in the first half Sporting couldn’t find an equaliser. The second half probably didn’t flow as well due to the number of substitutions but Rushall gradually made their status tell and grabbed two further goals to give them a comfortable 3-0 result in the end. The ground was one of those i love, a little rough around the edges but with plenty of character and two great little stands behind one goal, which allowed the crowd to find shelter during a brief shower. None of those characterless kit stands so many clubs drop in these days off straight from manufacturers (although they were to come later in the day). It’s always fabulous to discover another ground with a little soul and with ongoing building work going on, on the side of the ground with a small grass bank maybe the club are adding to their facilities. All in all a great visit with the early kick off presumably due to a wedding reception later in the afternoon for which the sizeable club house was prepared. The club house did provide one of the days interesting questions and answers though, when the guy in front of me asked why his can of Tango was £1.50!! , quick as flash the reply came from the barmaid ‘ it’s the sugar tax darling’… or not as the case may be!

After Wolverhampton, it was a cross country run to the town of Shepshed in Leicestershire, home of Shepshed Dynamo who play their football in the Step 5 Midland Football League. I have visited the Dovecote before to see AFC Halifax Town visit in an FA Trophy game a decade or so ago but my travelling companion was enjoying a first visit. And an enjoyable game #upthebutthole it was (look up the location of Shepshed’s ground for the truth behind that one)!. The visitors were Stamford AFC from the Northern Premier League Evo-Stik East, who brought a decent number of fans with them. Both teams cancelled each other out without creating too much in the first half but in the second Stamford always had the edge and finally notched a couple of goals as the game entered it’s latter stages to secure a 2-0 win, although Shepshed looked a decent side on the day and will on this evidence be amongst the front runners in their division this season.

The ground was again was one of those lovely non-league grounds with real character, 3 stands of differing designs on 3 sides of the pitch and some low-ceiling covered terracing which provided some much needed cover from the passing rain again. A tidy club house and a well stocked tea bar at decent prices, all added to a pleasant afternoon. Hopefully the weekend’s rain will also have brought a smile to the face of the Shepshed groundsman, who is currently battling with what is quite possibly the driest pitch i have ever seen!

Then it was a quick run across country, weaving in and out of Nottinghamshire and Leicestershire, to finally arrive in Lincolnshire and our final destination of the day, Eslaforde Park, the home of United Counties League side Sleaford Town.

The game against local rivals Deeping Rangers was actually a league game, with a few games brought forward to allow the league to be part of the organised Groundhop UK groundhop which took in various recreation fields and grounds in the United Counties League and Peterborough and District Football League. The more serious nature of the game added to the intensity and Deeping finally won out 1-0 winners, thanks to an early goal, in a game that held the attention throughout, without ever fully sparking into life.

Organised groundhop games always seem to bring out an additional item or two to the tea bar menu and the Spicy Sausage and Rice at £2 was a tasty bargain and must needed after a long day.

As for the ground, Eslaforde Park is one of those grounds, that divide opinion, a new build on the outskirts of town in 2005, it is what you would call functional, one dropped in stand, one small covered terrace, a large changing room building and not a lot else.. One of those grounds that provides a great base for a well run club to provide facilities for the community and junior teams but for the old fashioned side of me, lacks any real soul…

All in all though, a great day, 2 new grounds, 1 enjoyable re-visit and 3 decent games. Although apologies to all the home teams, who didn’t manage a single goal between them, i hope it wasn’t down to our presence.